Lilac Ministries
Sermon
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Topic: The Power Side of Grief
Mark 8:34-35: Then He called the crowd to Him along with His disciples and said: "If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for Me and for the gospel will save it."
Most people don’t like these verses. A cross symbolizes suffering and death. Who wants to walk around carrying something like that?
Truth be told, everyone here is carrying a cross. Everyone here has suffered an emotional or spiritual hurt that, if retold, would stir up the same emotions it did when it happened. If we try to ignore this cross, we remain nailed to it, in a sense. I believe that one aspect of these verses may be that we need to learn how to carry that cross of grief, not as a reminder of sorrow, but as an emblem of spiritual strength. In Christ, we can move from the broken side of grief to the power side of grief.
Thomas Edison, inventor of the microphone, phonograph and incandescent light bulb - as well as over 1,000 other things - is quoted as having said, "All religion is bunk.” But I believe all of us possess spiritual gifts, and Edison's was the powerful gift of determination.
By 1914 Edison had worked for 10 years on a storage battery and had spent the better part of his finances doing so. One December evening, spontaneous combustion broke out in the film room. Within minutes, all the packing compounds, celluloid for records and film, and other flammable goods were in flames. Fire companies from eight surrounding towns arrived, but the heat was so intense and the water pressure so low that the attempt to douse the flames was futile.
Edison lost everything. The damage exceeded two million dollars, but the buildings had been insured for only $238,000, since they were made of concrete and thought to be fireproof. With all his assets going up in a whoosh, would his spirit be broken?
How would you react to this situation?
The inventor's 24-year-old son, Charles, searched frantically for his father. He finally found him, calmly watching the fire, his face glowing in the reflection, his white hair blowing in the wind. As Charles later recalled, "My heart ached for him. He was 67 - no longer a young man - and everything was going up in flames." The elder Edison shouted to his son, "Where's your mother? Find her. Bring her here. She'll never see anything like this as long as she lives." The following morning, Edison looked at the ruins and said, "There is great value in disaster. All our mistakes are burned up. Thank God we can start anew." Three weeks after the fire, Edison managed to deliver the first phonograph.
Edison was quick to move from the broken side of grief to the power side of grief. It might take most of us a longer time, but I believe that, with Christ's help, all of us can do it.
How do we begin that process?
Ecclesiastes 7:4: The mind of the wise is in the house of mourning, while the mind of fools is in the house of pleasure.
Perhaps the first thing we need to do is truthfully acknowledge the pain, bitterness, anger, sorrow and grief that were nailed into our souls. Take a moment to recall the event that caused some of your spirit to bleed out of you. Do you still feel some of that emotion? I do. That's normal. But are you still seething with that emotion or seeking “Schadenfreude” [shahd-n-froi-duh], the satisfaction or pleasure felt at someone else's misfortune?
A vital step is to acknowledge that what we experienced was truly devastating. We don't need someone else to experience a similar disaster in order to validate our pain. Instead, we can tell Christ about our grief, knowing that He has already shared in our suffering. If you’ve not done so, I hope you’ll take some serious time tonight or this week to write down or pray to the Lord about your grief and then ask Him to hold it in His cupped hands.
Another important step is to believe that a better future exists.
Jeremiah 29:11: "For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans for welfare and not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope."
God specializes in redemptive love. If He worked in a medical clinic, He might be referred to as the Redemptionologist. He not only heals the hurt of broken souls; He brings something good from it. It is important to note that we will likely still carry a scar, but that is exactly what I think Jesus means when He says to carry our cross. It shows we have suffered, but it also shows we have healed. This gives us power to help others work toward healing after similar tragedies.
Finally, we need to move spiritually and emotionally away from the place of our sorrow, our crucifixion. We need to move forward. For many people, this is the hardest step to take.
After we’ve been through a difficult circumstance, time covers over part of our sorrow, but many of us no longer make an effort to move forward with that part of our life. We shut it down. In our relationships, we might decide that we'll never speak to those who hurt us. In our church, we may avoid volunteering. In our work, we may avoid helping out in particular situations. We seek a safe place where no one will bother us, and we become as stagnant as a pond.
A bad thing about avoiding a circumstance that might hurt us again is that this avoidance also precludes our experiencing wonderful things. The result is that the only good things we can recall belong to "the good old days,” before disaster struck. And not surprisingly, we tend to try to preserve or recreate those former days.
"If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me."
Let us deny ourselves the desire to stagnate or to wish others ill. Let us each day ask Jesus Christ to show us just one more step toward our future. Let us move forward by heeding His call to us: "Follow Me."
When we do this, we begin to exercise the power side of grief.
In 1980, Candy Lightner founded MADD, after her daughter, Cari, was killed by a repeat drunk-driving offender. In 1857, Jeremiah Lanphier, emotionally and spiritually discouraged, started a prayer meeting of one that grew into prayer meetings of thousands. You'll find his story in today's bulletin.
I do not know what miracle God may perform in your life or mine, but I do know this: He is much more able to work with someone walking in faith than with someone sitting in wishful thinking or resentful anger. I pray us all strong footsteps as we walk confidently on the power side of grief.
Sermon by Brett Watson,
Lilac Ministries
Presented at St. John United Church of Christ